What is Fear Holding You Back From?

person sitting on the edge of a cliff

Fear is in the front of everyone’s minds right now. It is natural and logical to have some fear. Fear can keep us from making some stupid decisions. It can also keep us from taking positive risks.

I’ve always hated being held back by fear. I have jumped out of a plane, swam with sharks, and dove the blue hole 140 feet down. Yes, I am still a little afraid of a bicycle, but I am working on it.

Fear of rejection is a fear that seems to creep back. When I was young (younger, that is) and single in New York City, I decided to face my fear head-on. I was good friends with my now-husband through a swing dance community. He was 5 years younger than me, but he didn’t know that, because I purposefully neglected to tell him which birthday it was when I invited him to my party (it was 30, by the way).

I had a crush on him and was pretty sure that he didn’t feel the same way. That fear of rejection kept me from acting on my feelings for a while. But I decided I would rather know for sure, just in case I was wrong…

So after watching a movie in Bryant Park one summer night, we were walking home and I said “I am pretty sure you don’t feel the same way but just in case I’m wrong, I wanted to let you know I’m interested.”

He smiled and said, “you’re right, I’m not. But that was really cool of you.”

I responded, “I didn’t think so, but wasn’t it?! I am so proud of myself!”

I proceeded to tell him that I had never put myself out there that way before and I was so proud that I took the risk. I wasn’t upset. In fact, I was on a high. He called me the next day and when I answered I said “Still proud of myself!” He laughed.

Eventually, he figured it out, but that is what I get for falling for a much younger guy.

That fear of rejection has been holding me back again. I have been talking about doing a live Q&A for the longest time, but have been afraid no one would show up.

Well, I am taking the risk. It helps that I won’t be doing it alone. Brett Allan asked me to go live with him – and I am doing it! It is a FB live and perhaps I can figure out how to live stream it on LI too.

I hope my story gets you thinking about what is fear holding you back from and inspired you to take the risk.

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