I know guilt is a useless emotion, yet it drives behavior more than we would like to admit.
So, I have been thinking about the question, “Is guilt a good motivator?”
My current thinking… it depends. Of course it depends! It depends on what you feel guilty about and what action it motivates. If you did something wrong and you are motivated to make corrective actions, then I am all for the guilt. If you made a mistake and it causes you to beat yourself up to no end, then guilt is not your friend.
As for me, I have felt guilty about not doing the Lupus Research Alliance’s Walk for a Cure last year after being top fundraisers for several years in a row. The guilt had me donate directly but that didn’t erase the guilt. What I realized is that this event is about more than the fundraising for me. Don’t get me wrong, please donate! You can do that HERE.
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As top fundraisers, we got to cut the ribbon and even ended up on the evening news.
My guilt over not participating was because of the missed opportunity to spread the word, to educate, and of course to raise more money than I could donate on my own. The amazing thing about the LRA is that every dollar raised goes directly to research. Since the LRA Board covers all fundraising and administrative costs, 100% of your gift will support lupus research programs.
So, my guilt is having me make up for it by sharing, educating, and hopefully raising some money. For those unfamiliar with it, Lupus is a painful autoimmune disease that is more common than leukemia, muscular dystrophy, cerebral palsy, multiple sclerosis and cystic fibrosis. Yet, it doesn’t get nearly the same attention or research dollars to find a cure for this currently incurable condition.
Because no two cases are exactly the same and its symptoms mimic those of other diseases, the exact cause of lupus is unknown, so it is difficult to diagnose. I was seeing three different types of doctors before one put the puzzle pieces together and I was diagnosed in 2018. We were also lucky that in December of 2020, the doctors finally figured out why my son was getting sick so often. It took two biopsies, and three opinions to get his diagnosis of lupus nephritis and rapidly progressive kidney disease. Right before his 15th birthday, he started chemo.
The LRA was amazing to us, connecting us to specialists, explaining treatments, and simply offering support during a scary time. I hope none of you go through a similar experience, but if you do, I hope you find an organization like the LRA to guide you.
The good news, James is in remission, and in his freshman year at Michigan – the reason for our team’s name Blue Maize & Purple.
Thank you for letting me take action on the guilt and hopefully make up for lost time by spreading this information out to all of you. If you feel inclined to donate, I would be grateful. If you want to share this post to help me spread the message, that would be amazing too!
Sometimes guilt can be a powerful driver of needed action. Make sure your guilt is serving you to act in a productive way.